GROW: Anchored in Integrity - The Core of Every Great Leader

Six years of building character. One core value that changes everything. Here's what we've learned...

Welcome Back, G-Tribe!

October 7, 2025 Issue #105

October marks a milestone for us. Six years ago, A Few Good MENtors opened its doors with a simple promise: to guide young men toward character-driven leadership.

Six years. Over 50 mentees. Dozens of mentors. Thousands of lives changed.

This month, we're diving deep into the value that started it all: integrity.

For our new subscribers: welcome to G.R.O.W., where Guidance Redefines Our Way. You've joined the G-Tribe at the perfect time. Because integrity isn't just our founding principle, it's the difference between leaders people follow and leaders people abandon.

Here's what makes integrity different from other leadership qualities: you can fake confidence. You can pretend to care. You can even manufacture charisma for a while.

But you can't fake integrity.

People see through it. They feel it when it's missing. And they remember when you choose it over convenience.

This week, we're exploring what integrity looks like when the stakes are high, when no one's watching, and when doing the right thing costs you something real.

Because after six years of mentoring young men, we've learned this truth: integrity isn't what you do when it's easy. It's what you do when it's hard.

Let's get into it.

Growth Spotlight: Integrity Isn't Optional - Leading When No One's Watching

Marcus Williams sat in his car outside the convenience store at 11:47 PM. The cashier had given him too much change. Twenty dollars too much. Twenty dollars, he desperately needed for his overdue electricity bill and his daughter's birthday.

No one would know. The cashier wouldn't remember him.

Marcus got out of the car and walked back inside.

That moment in the parking lot? That's where leadership is born, not in boardrooms or at graduation ceremonies. Leadership is born when you make the choice that costs you something.

Now, I know this is a hypothetical situation. But here's the thing: you've probably experienced something similar. That feeling in your gut when you realize you could get away with something. When doing the wrong thing would be easier, when no one would ever know.

That moment? That's your character being tested.

Research from the Josephson Institute studied 43,000 high school students over a decade. The findings were stark: students who cheated in small ways in high school were more likely to engage in serious ethical violations as adults. Translation: integrity isn't situational. It's habitual.

Real integrity has three components: consistency between words and actions, courage to do right when it's costly, and accountability without excuses.

Here's what happens when you build a reputation for integrity: In Month 1, people notice that you keep your word. By Month 6, they trust you with more significant responsibilities. Year 1, they recommend you for opportunities. Year 5, your reputation opens doors before you even knock.

Marcus returned the twenty dollars. The cashier was shocked. Six months later, the store manager remembered him and offered him a better position. Three years after that, Marcus was managing his own location.

One choice. One moment of integrity. A lifetime of compound returns.

The young men and women watching you right now need to see this: integrity isn't optional. It's the foundation on which everything else is built. Choose it when it costs you. Choose it when no one's watching. Choose it every single time.

Professional Growth Gateway: Building Trust Through Character in Leadership

Walk into any company dealing with a crisis. Nine times out of ten, you'll find the exact root cause: someone in leadership traded integrity for short-term gain.

Deloitte surveyed 3,000 employees across industries. The results were clear: 65% said they'd take a pay cut to work for a leader they trusted. People value character-driven leadership more than money.

Why? Because working for someone without integrity is exhausting. You're constantly covering for them, worrying about what they'll do next, and wondering if they'll throw you under the bus when things go wrong.

Character isn't a nice-to-have in leadership. It's the prerequisite for everything else.

Building trust requires five pillars: Do what you say. Tell the truth, even when it's uncomfortable. Give credit and take blame. Make decisions based on principles, not politics. Treat everyone with respect.

Your word is your currency in professional settings. When you commit to something, follow through on it. Miss a deadline? Communicate early—leaders who make excuses destroy trust. Leaders who own their commitments build it.

Bad news doesn't get better with age. Problems don't solve themselves. Leaders with integrity share difficult information quickly because teams can't solve problems they are unaware of.

How you treat people who can't help you reveals your character. The janitor. The intern. The person in another department you'll never work with again. Character-driven leaders understand: every person deserves respect because respect is a baseline, not a reward.

Building a reputation for integrity takes time and effort. Weeks 1-4, people watch for consistency. Months 2-6, they test you with small responsibilities. In Year 1, they trust you with significant decisions. Years 5+, your reputation becomes your greatest asset.

Sometimes doing the right thing has immediate negative consequences. You report a problem and get blamed. You refuse something unethical and lose an opportunity. These moments test your commitment to integrity.

Here's what we tell young men: the cost of integrity is paid once. The cost of lacking integrity is paid forever.

Success Spotlight: Leaders Who Chose Integrity Over Popularity

History remembers leaders who chose character over convenience. Here are three stories that demonstrate that integrity always prevails.

Cynthia Cooper worked as Vice President of Internal Audit at WorldCom in 2002. She discovered accounting fraud that hid $3.8 billion in losses. She could have stayed quiet and kept her job. Instead, she reported it. The company collapsed. Thousands lost their jobs. Cooper faced death threats. But she also exposed one of the largest corporate frauds in history. Time Magazine named her one of three "Persons of the Year" in 2002. Twenty years later, her reputation remains unshakeable.

In 2011, high school basketball coach Ken Carter locked his undefeated team out of the gym. Why? His players weren't meeting academic standards. Parents were furious. The community protested. Carter didn't budge. His message was clear: basketball is temporary. Character is permanent. His players got their grades up and learned that excellence in one area doesn't excuse failure in another.

In 2019, Aaron Feuerstein's textile mill in Massachusetts was destroyed by fire. Insurance would cover the loss. He could have closed the plant and fired 3,000 employees right before Christmas. Instead, he kept everyone on payroll and rebuilt the factory. It cost him millions. But his workers never forgot. Productivity increased. Loyalty skyrocketed. The plant became more efficient than ever.

Cooper. Carter. Feuerstein. Three different fields. One common pattern: they faced moments where doing the right thing came at a serious cost. They chose integrity anyway. And their legacy outlasted any short-term sacrifice.

You will face your moment at a time when integrity costs you something real. Your response defines who you become.

Your test might be smaller on the surface. Covering for a friend who made a mistake. Taking credit for work you didn't do. Staying silent when you should speak up. The scale doesn't matter. The principle does.

Every time you choose integrity when it costs you something, you're building character that creates lasting success.

Michael's Hot Take: Celebrating 6 Years of AFGM's Integrity in Action

Six years ago, we made a promise.

We said we'd build a mentoring program that puts character first. That refuses to compromise on values. That measures success not in numbers but in transformed lives.

Six years later, I can tell you: keeping that promise hasn't always been easy.

The Temptation to Compromise

We've had opportunities to grow faster by lowering our standards. Funders who wanted us to track different metrics. Partners who suggested we focus more on outcomes and less on character.

We could have triple our size by now if we'd been willing to compromise our core values.

We said no. Every time.

Why? Because we understand something that took us years to learn: integrity in an organization works the same way it works in a person.

You can't fake it. You can't turn it on and off. You can't compromise when it's convenient and claim it when it's profitable.

Integrity is who you are when no one's looking. It's what you do when doing the right thing costs you.

What We've Learned

Integrity Attracts the Right People

Every mentor in our program? They're here because they believe in character-driven leadership. They're not here for resume lines or networking opportunities.

That means we have mentors who show up. Who invest deeply. Who model the integrity we're trying to build in young men.

You can't buy that kind of commitment. You earn it by being an organization worth committing to.

Standards Create Safety

When young men know we mean what we say, they trust us. When they trust us, they're willing to be vulnerable. And vulnerability is where real growth happens.

If we compromised our standards, we'd lose that trust. And without trust, mentoring is just talking.

Slow Growth Beats Fast Collapse

We could have grown faster. However, rapid growth without solid foundations often leads to collapse.

Instead, we've grown steadily. Every mentee gets the attention they deserve. Every mentor receives the support they need. Every program maintains quality.

Six years in, we're still standing. Still growing. Still changing lives.

That doesn't happen by accident. It happens when you choose integrity over expansion.

The Cost and the Return

Has our commitment to integrity cost us opportunities? Absolutely.

Has it cost us money? For sure.

Has it slowed our growth? Probably.

Would we change anything? Not a chance.

Because here's what we've gained: a reputation that opens doors. Young men who become leaders are worth following. Mentors who trust us completely. A community that believes in what we're building.

You can't put a price tag on that.

Looking Forward

As we start year seven, we're making the same promise we made on day one: we will not compromise our integrity. Not for growth. Not for funding. Not for recognition.

We will continue to build young men who understand that character matters more than convenience.

We will continue to show up for every mentee, every mentor, and every family that trusts us with their sons.

We will remain anchored in integrity, even when it comes at a cost.

Because after six years, we've learned this truth: the only sustainable success is the kind built on character.

Everything else eventually crumbles.

Join Us

If you're a young man seeking to develop character-driven leadership, we invite you to be mentored.

If you're a man who wants to invest in the next generation, we need you as a mentor.

If you believe in what we're doing, share this newsletter with someone who needs to read it.

Six years down. A lifetime of impact ahead.

Together, we're proving that integrity isn't optional. It's the foundation on which everything else is built.

Ready to Build Your Legacy?

Join A Few Good MENtors as a mentee and discover what character-driven leadership looks like in real life.

Volunteer as a mentor and invest in young men who are hungry for guidance.

Please share this newsletter with someone who needs to read it.

Real men aren't born. They're built. One choice at a time. One day at a time. One young man at a time.

Here's to six more years of integrity in action.

Have a story about a time you chose integrity when it cost you something? Questions about our mentoring programs? Reply to this newsletter. We read every response and often feature community stories in future issues.

Join the G-Tribe community at afewgoodmentors.org